A letter

I have been anticipating getting my 2nd letter from Hilarie for about a week now. I have honestly checked the mail every night when I get home hoping I have a letter from her. I guess it's silly but I have doubts about how she feels about me and having her gone sure doesn't help. I checked the mail every day this week and cussed when I didn't see a letter from her. I'm really just sad, not mad. I just want to hear how she's doing and quite frankly I want to hear that she loves me.

Today was basically the same drill. I went to an RSL game with Brad this afternoon. When he dropped me off I checked the spot where my roomates put the mail and I checked the mail box, nothing. I was feeling very discouraged and I wondered if it was just me. Maybe she's writing other people more often. I figure it's just that she can't right much so I'm trying to stay optimistic.

As I'm thinking about how much I miss her and how I wish I'd just get a damn letter my phone rings. Normally if I don't know a phone number I don't answer, but I recognize the area code as a Texas area code, and I figure it's Hilarie. It's funny how prayers are answered.

I only got to talk to her for a few quick minutes. We had a bad connection and I couldn't understand her too well. I told her I missed her, and she said she missed me. I heard and said an I love you more then once. It is comforting to know she still loves me. I guess it's silly to think she didn't, but it's an honest fear.

In this case, for me, absence has made my heart grow fonder. I realize that my whole life I felt like something was missing. Even when I was with my whole family I felt like someone or something was missing. I never figured it out until Hilarie was gone. I honestly feel like it was her that was missing.

It's an amazing feeling when you finally understand something that important. It's also a little scary for me when I feel down and think she doesn't love me. Obviously this phone call changed that and alleviated my fears. But now that I know I want to marry her more then anything the thought of not having her is quite scary to me.

At any rate, I love her and I've heard from her. She loves me too, it's just good to hear.