It's quite simple

Most things are easy to understand when you strip off the outer layers. When you see what's really at the center of things the outside makes more sense, at least most of the time. The outer layer seems to be a simple way of protecting the core. Well we all do things to protect ourselves. It's silly really what we do, but we do it. I think we'd all be surprised if we stopping overanalyzing the outside and questioned what was on the inside.

I'm trying to be honest with myself here. I don't think I've let anybody in for a while. I think I've built up a lot of protective layers around the real issues for a long time. When I find someone I trust I don't know what to tell them because I'm so buried in layers I don't know which ones are real and which ones are not. I'm laughing right now because I am painting a picture that makes it seem like my life is bleak and horrible and "Why me?" But it's really fine for the most part, I've just noticed that I have had a lot of bitterness towards certain people about things outside their control. Bitterness is kind of a nice feeling at times, but it really isn't very productive in the long run.

I'm not making any public apologies or anything so if you were holding out for one, tough. Hahahaha at least I never built a layer around my sense of humor.